Saturday, May 31, 2008
About to Graduate!
Well, you know me, you already know that I graduated early and I have my diploma. But, today is the ceremony. I can't blog for very long, but I wanted to try to put down some of my feelings at this time. OH My gosh.. I am jittery and I have a stomach ache. Part of me does not even realize that I am doing this. I am going to be there at the stadium and wonder why I am in a cap and gown. Is this really happening? I have looked forward to this day since the beginning of high school. I have thought of many different scenarios and now it seems like it will different then I had ever thought. I am happy, scared, worried, anxious, overjoyed and just a wild mix of emotions. But, here I go.. I am ready to officially become part of the graduating class of 2008.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Please Don't Hate Me..
I really have been busy. I try to make the time to just set aside 30 minutes to updating this blog but it is hard to find that. I am trying to find money for college, find a job, work online (more about that in a minute) and just live life. It is getting harder and harder, but it is also more exciting. I don't have time to do the things I used to do, and I know I am neglecting a lot of things: friends (some offline, lots online..), reading, preparing academically for college, TV Shows, message boards, writing.. Just lots of things.. I know I can't get everything done and have time for everything.. but find balance is hard to learn and adjust. And now.. on to what I have been doing..
Accomplishments-
I swam by myself for a little while. It was really scary at first, but then I did not want to stop. I swam in front of the pool wall so if I felt like I was going to sink, I could grab onto the ledge. It was fun though. I was just thinking that I had to try it.. "It is now or never." So I did it.. not just treading water.. (which I am doing really good at..) but actually kicking and moving through the water with my arms and legs. After we got out of the pool, I was shaking. I could not stop shaking and laughing. I did not think I was going to do that. I have always been fearful of swimming, so for me to swim like that was out of my comfort zone. It was amazing, and I was very proud of myself.
I convinced financial aid to give me more money.. Well, there was a mistake on the FAFSA. The government actually owed me more money with the Pell Grant. It was their mistake and so I looked into it and found out enough information to tell them what happened. I told them about it and I was not sure they would do anything.. They told me they would look into it though.. The next day, I checked my online award and I 500 dollars more in that Pell Grant. It was a "God Thing" because he helped me see the problem and he helped them see it too.
I got a job online.. ChaCha.. It is a service that answers your from your phone. You text them a question and you get a live answer back, usually in about 3 minutes. The people that answer the questions are called Guides. I am a proud ChaCha Guide. I actually earn .20 for every question. I have made 225 dollars since starting a month ago. I am glad I found a way to make extra money because I need every penny I earn. Without this job, I don't think I would have been able to make a deposit for college. So, if you want to, you can use ChaCha and help me go to college. . Also, if you want to become a ChaCha Guide and earn a little extra money answering questions (it can be really fun.. trust me..) leave a comment and I will help you become one. It's really simple and it is worth it.
Hardships-
Not everything this past month and this month has been fun and rewarding.. I have struggled more then I feel I have ever struggled (at least it feels like it.) Finding money for college is so stressful and sometimes I feel as if it is impossible. Sometimes I feel like I drowning in a sea of doubt. Sometimes I don't feel I am working hard enough or doing enough, but I know I am trying my best. Most of the time I just cry because I want this so bad, and I just don't know how I can make it work. I am trusting God with it, but I get scared that this is not where He wants me to me. There are have been so many "God Things" with this college, but things change so fast.. I just hope and pray that He will lead me to where I need to go. I know he will never leave me or abandon me, and it seems like I need him more then ever.
Once again.. I am dreadfully sorry for forgetting about you all.. Just know that I am trying my best and I still care for those who read this..
Talk to ya all later,
Brenna
P.S- I think I might have poison Ivy rash. Sound fun, right? It is..
Accomplishments-
I swam by myself for a little while. It was really scary at first, but then I did not want to stop. I swam in front of the pool wall so if I felt like I was going to sink, I could grab onto the ledge. It was fun though. I was just thinking that I had to try it.. "It is now or never." So I did it.. not just treading water.. (which I am doing really good at..) but actually kicking and moving through the water with my arms and legs. After we got out of the pool, I was shaking. I could not stop shaking and laughing. I did not think I was going to do that. I have always been fearful of swimming, so for me to swim like that was out of my comfort zone. It was amazing, and I was very proud of myself.
I convinced financial aid to give me more money.. Well, there was a mistake on the FAFSA. The government actually owed me more money with the Pell Grant. It was their mistake and so I looked into it and found out enough information to tell them what happened. I told them about it and I was not sure they would do anything.. They told me they would look into it though.. The next day, I checked my online award and I 500 dollars more in that Pell Grant. It was a "God Thing" because he helped me see the problem and he helped them see it too.
I got a job online.. ChaCha.. It is a service that answers your from your phone. You text them a question and you get a live answer back, usually in about 3 minutes. The people that answer the questions are called Guides. I am a proud ChaCha Guide. I actually earn .20 for every question. I have made 225 dollars since starting a month ago. I am glad I found a way to make extra money because I need every penny I earn. Without this job, I don't think I would have been able to make a deposit for college. So, if you want to, you can use ChaCha and help me go to college. . Also, if you want to become a ChaCha Guide and earn a little extra money answering questions (it can be really fun.. trust me..) leave a comment and I will help you become one. It's really simple and it is worth it.
Hardships-
Not everything this past month and this month has been fun and rewarding.. I have struggled more then I feel I have ever struggled (at least it feels like it.) Finding money for college is so stressful and sometimes I feel as if it is impossible. Sometimes I feel like I drowning in a sea of doubt. Sometimes I don't feel I am working hard enough or doing enough, but I know I am trying my best. Most of the time I just cry because I want this so bad, and I just don't know how I can make it work. I am trusting God with it, but I get scared that this is not where He wants me to me. There are have been so many "God Things" with this college, but things change so fast.. I just hope and pray that He will lead me to where I need to go. I know he will never leave me or abandon me, and it seems like I need him more then ever.
Once again.. I am dreadfully sorry for forgetting about you all.. Just know that I am trying my best and I still care for those who read this..
Talk to ya all later,
Brenna
P.S- I think I might have poison Ivy rash. Sound fun, right? It is..
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Easter Sunday
Hey all!
If you want to listen to some music while you are here, I found some radio stations that you can play right here on this page. I thought that was kind of neat. They also have a TV, but then you would not read my posts. You would be watching TV then. So, I got the TV thing for my self. I put it on my Google page. It is pretty neat how we can do all these things in one spot. It is really anymore simpler then before though? Oooo, I just found a new gadget for my page. It is kind of fun to see what it out there for websites.
So, It is Easter today, and our church had too services. One at 8:30am and 10:30 am. I had to sing for both of them. It was sort of tiring, but it was different. I did not get breakfast before the first service. I had to wait till it was over to eat. Then, I felt much more alive and I think I did better the second time around.
Easter is really special to me, but sometimes I don't understand all the hype over one day. We are supposed to celebrate Jesus everyday. It is good to devote one day to celebrating but it should not be made a once a year thing. Let's celebrate the fact that Christ died for us everyday!
Happy Easter all!
Brenna
If you want to listen to some music while you are here, I found some radio stations that you can play right here on this page. I thought that was kind of neat. They also have a TV, but then you would not read my posts. You would be watching TV then. So, I got the TV thing for my self. I put it on my Google page. It is pretty neat how we can do all these things in one spot. It is really anymore simpler then before though? Oooo, I just found a new gadget for my page. It is kind of fun to see what it out there for websites.
So, It is Easter today, and our church had too services. One at 8:30am and 10:30 am. I had to sing for both of them. It was sort of tiring, but it was different. I did not get breakfast before the first service. I had to wait till it was over to eat. Then, I felt much more alive and I think I did better the second time around.
Easter is really special to me, but sometimes I don't understand all the hype over one day. We are supposed to celebrate Jesus everyday. It is good to devote one day to celebrating but it should not be made a once a year thing. Let's celebrate the fact that Christ died for us everyday!
Happy Easter all!
Brenna
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Is winter over yet?
Do you like my snowman? I make it when the big snowstorm came through where I live. We got about 7 inches. It was pretty crazy, but I was glad to be able to just stay home and enjoy the snow from outside. Well, except when we had to shovel. I really don't like shoveling. My sisters don't mind it, but I would rather do many other things. But while we were outside, we had a snowball fight (where my youngest got my face) and we tried to build a snowman. "It looks more like a mountain," says the youngest. I agree, but it is harder to make those snowmen you see in movies or even down the street. It takes alot of time and I just don't have that much time anymore.
And now I will talk about the things that take up my time.
First, I am trying to apply to scholarships and all that jazz. Oh, it is fun stuff. I turned in the FAFSA, but they need verification so we need to send in our tax returns and W2s. Yes, since I worked last year, I got to file a tax return. I got all 22 dollars back. Oh, well.. It's some money. I used it to buy one of my closest friends a birthday gift. Back to scholarships though.. I have been applying but I have not received any official money yet. This sort of worries me sometimes. I don't have any other place to go if I can't afford my dream college. I don't want to go to a community college. I really think God wants me at this college, but I am having a hard time trusting that He will provide the funds. I just have to have faith and just keep doing what I am doing, I guess.
It has been sort of weird since I have graduated. I just don't know what to do during the day sometimes. I will read, clean my room or just do other things that make me feel productive. And then, telling people I have graduated is sort of weird. A part of me forgets that I graduated early and its not May yet and the other part thinks I am still a senior. I have my diploma now though. I thought it would be bigger but I am still really happy. It is on our fireplace so it is on display. I am pretty proud, but still humbled, knowing that I never thought I could do it. God thought I could though. Sometimes, I am still trying to figure out what the purpose of graduating early is. I probably won't have a job until summer anyway. I don't know.. It's not like I miss high school, but I wish I knew what I was supposed to do now.
Well, I am glad I could find the time to write here. I miss it sometimes. You know what's funny? Every day I think about the things I could write about here, but I don't make the time to actually write them. I would love to just write about everything from college worries to American Idol, but by the time I still down to write them out, I don't do it. It is kind of strange but I guess that is the way I am wired. I think too much.. :)
BTW- About American Idol. My favorites are David A, Brook, David C, Jason C, Carly and Micheal. Wow, that is like half of the top 12. Hehehe. My sister is like the biggest David A fan and she goes nuts on the American Idol message boards. In case you guys don't remember or know who David A is...
Over and Out,
Brenna
Saturday, February 2, 2008
I think it may be time for a new blog post..
Okay, I am going to stop applogizing for not updating my blog here. I usually start off with that every post, because lately I have been only posting maybe once or twice a month. So, yeah. I try my best, but sometimes I forget or I do something else when I finally do remember.
So, I do remember that I wanted to tell you guys if I could graduate early or not. I could and I did. I am a high school graduate even though I don't brag about it as much as I did when I first found out. I posted it everywhere. I told some of my friends, but there are still poeple that have no idea. They will probably be mad if I did not tell them. I hope not. I am still waiting for my diploma. Everything happened so fast. I was planning on finished my year with Pyshics and Spanish, but then I realized I have all my credits. Within that week, I was making phone calls and writing emails to make sure everything was OK for me to graduate. It was and I could not believe it. I still have a hard time when people ask me what school I go to or what grade I am in.
About driving.. I have had two formal lessons with an instructer so far. It has been really scary, yet really fun. The first time I went out, I felt like I was going to pass out. I had a death grip on the steering wheel and the intructer kept telling me to relax. I could not even think about relaxing. I was going 55 down a country road! I could feel the car moving agianst the wind. When I was in the cities and towns, it was better because I did not have to go as fast. Oh, but I hate the turns. Left turns make me really nervous. I also have a habit of riding the break while making a turn, so by the time the turn is over, I am stopped. Then I have to turn the steering wheel back to center. The second time I when driving, I hit the curb because I accelorated while I still had the steering wheel to the right. I learned at that point that I need the let go of the steering wheel after I make a turn. The steering wheel will go back to center by itself. I feel a little bit better about driving now, but I don't think it will become my favorite activity for a while yet.
Well, I need to get back to doing some work. I still have quite a bit of work to do do.
TTYL,
Brenna
So, I do remember that I wanted to tell you guys if I could graduate early or not. I could and I did. I am a high school graduate even though I don't brag about it as much as I did when I first found out. I posted it everywhere. I told some of my friends, but there are still poeple that have no idea. They will probably be mad if I did not tell them. I hope not. I am still waiting for my diploma. Everything happened so fast. I was planning on finished my year with Pyshics and Spanish, but then I realized I have all my credits. Within that week, I was making phone calls and writing emails to make sure everything was OK for me to graduate. It was and I could not believe it. I still have a hard time when people ask me what school I go to or what grade I am in.
About driving.. I have had two formal lessons with an instructer so far. It has been really scary, yet really fun. The first time I went out, I felt like I was going to pass out. I had a death grip on the steering wheel and the intructer kept telling me to relax. I could not even think about relaxing. I was going 55 down a country road! I could feel the car moving agianst the wind. When I was in the cities and towns, it was better because I did not have to go as fast. Oh, but I hate the turns. Left turns make me really nervous. I also have a habit of riding the break while making a turn, so by the time the turn is over, I am stopped. Then I have to turn the steering wheel back to center. The second time I when driving, I hit the curb because I accelorated while I still had the steering wheel to the right. I learned at that point that I need the let go of the steering wheel after I make a turn. The steering wheel will go back to center by itself. I feel a little bit better about driving now, but I don't think it will become my favorite activity for a while yet.
Well, I need to get back to doing some work. I still have quite a bit of work to do do.
TTYL,
Brenna
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Life's the most intense roller coaster..
Hey all,
I am quite sorry it has been so long. With the new year bring new ways to be busy. I know that I need to make a little more time to just write here, cuz I know that the few people who actually read this love it.
Well, I am doing well. This past week has been wild because it was the last week of the first semester in school. I was racing to get everything turned in by Friday. I was three weeks behind in English and I only had ONE week. I was really stressing and worrying. I look back now and laugh because I got it all done with two hours to spare. (I had until Midnight) I am so relieved and I have just been vegging out since. I could def. use some relax time after all that. Something also pretty crazy is that I have all my credits needed to graduate. I have passed the required testing too. I am eligible to graduate now. It's pretty surreal. I am actually going to talk to my counselor next week to see if I can just be done with high school or take only one class. Can you imagine? I might be able to graduate a semester early! Then I could spend more time preparing for college and maybe get a full time job. I will make sure I let you know what she says.
I am not been doing any driving yet this year. I think it might have something to do with the last time I drove, I crashed into our fence. Oh, I did not tell you about that? Yep, I knocked down the metal fence in front of the house. I might see if I can put up a picture later. We have fixed it yet. It looks pretty funny. What happened was I coming into our driveway too fast and my dad told me to put my put on the brake. He was screaming "Brake. Brake!" Well, I moved my put over to the accelerator instead. I sped into the fence and I never saw it comming. I braked then, of course! I could have ran into the swingset and then the house if I forgot to brake. I laughed and then I cried and then I laughed again. I still have mixed feelings when I look at it.
The other things that go on have been pretty normal. Right now I am watching a movie with my sister. We are watching Flicka. It is a movie about horses and my sister loves horses. It is actually pretty hard to watch the movie and try to post here. It's kind of funny how if I am writing I forget the movie and if I am watching to movie I forget about the............... oh I am writing this.. I was watching the movie. Well, I better get going and finish watching the movie. I can't really.................pay attention to two things at once.
TTYL,
Brenna
I am quite sorry it has been so long. With the new year bring new ways to be busy. I know that I need to make a little more time to just write here, cuz I know that the few people who actually read this love it.
Well, I am doing well. This past week has been wild because it was the last week of the first semester in school. I was racing to get everything turned in by Friday. I was three weeks behind in English and I only had ONE week. I was really stressing and worrying. I look back now and laugh because I got it all done with two hours to spare. (I had until Midnight) I am so relieved and I have just been vegging out since. I could def. use some relax time after all that. Something also pretty crazy is that I have all my credits needed to graduate. I have passed the required testing too. I am eligible to graduate now. It's pretty surreal. I am actually going to talk to my counselor next week to see if I can just be done with high school or take only one class. Can you imagine? I might be able to graduate a semester early! Then I could spend more time preparing for college and maybe get a full time job. I will make sure I let you know what she says.
I am not been doing any driving yet this year. I think it might have something to do with the last time I drove, I crashed into our fence. Oh, I did not tell you about that? Yep, I knocked down the metal fence in front of the house. I might see if I can put up a picture later. We have fixed it yet. It looks pretty funny. What happened was I coming into our driveway too fast and my dad told me to put my put on the brake. He was screaming "Brake. Brake!" Well, I moved my put over to the accelerator instead. I sped into the fence and I never saw it comming. I braked then, of course! I could have ran into the swingset and then the house if I forgot to brake. I laughed and then I cried and then I laughed again. I still have mixed feelings when I look at it.
The other things that go on have been pretty normal. Right now I am watching a movie with my sister. We are watching Flicka. It is a movie about horses and my sister loves horses. It is actually pretty hard to watch the movie and try to post here. It's kind of funny how if I am writing I forget the movie and if I am watching to movie I forget about the............... oh I am writing this.. I was watching the movie. Well, I better get going and finish watching the movie. I can't really.................pay attention to two things at once.
TTYL,
Brenna
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